Brothers

We all know brothers have such a unique bond, but it is still great when you get to witness it.

The other morning I brought A & B into the living room. We change play and change diapers before eating breakfast. Baby A kept walking to the patio door, but I could not see what he was looking at because the curtains were closed.

After a few moments of standing there our cat Cid ran from under the curtains and hoped through the gate into the kitchen to safety. Baby A stood there for a few minutes longer and then walked away.

As we resumed playing, Cid jumped back into the living room and went to the window. This is highly unusual activity- normally the cats keep as far a distance to the babies as possible and only come into the living room during naps and at night. Baby A started approaching the cat and the cat could not decide if he should stay by the window or run away. Now I knew something was up. Why wasn't he escaping?

I decided to move over to the patio door, and to my surprise I saw our other cat, Gato on the other side! Now, they are not outdoor cats and have never even roamed outside in our current house. Cid was trying to be with Gato from inside the house and risked exposure to babies just to keep him company and let us know he was out there.

After I let Gato in, he ran to get food and water and gorged himself. To my amazement the other cat ran to the bowls and acted thirsty and hungry too. I figure he probably spent the night at the door inside the house keeping Gato company and never ate or drank. What good brothers.

How did we get here?

I really don't feel my age, ok maybe phsyically but not mentally. Sometimes I am not sure I am old enough to be a mother even when I am with my boys.

What makes me really feel old is my pantry. How did I get such a full pantry. I think that a pantry this full belongs to someone who has been in a house for years, cooks, and has kids that actually eat adult food. My pantry looks like a collection that had to have started 20 years ago.

We have moved twice in the past year and I still have a pantry bursting at the seams. How did we acquire all this food and why? I don't even know what I would do with much of it and I am not really sure I like some of it. Didn't I buy it all? Did we inherit canned food and baking items from someone?

I know I am not old enough to have collected all of this!

Was it worth it?

The boys are now almost 14 months old- how did it happen? Every time I look at them they have changed so much. I feel like I can't even remember exactly what they looked like 3 months ago, 2 months ago, even 1 month ago. They certainly don't look like babies.

We have taken a lot of photos, but most are just not quite perfect. And certainly, we have very few photos of the two boys together and only a hand full of the 4 of us.

I decided I wanted to capture this time in photos we would be proud to share. We hired a photographer to take pictures and planned to take them at a great out door shopping center.

It was enough stress figuring out clothes for us all, timing when they boys would be at their best and getting ourselves ready on time.

We made it, everyone looked good, we were on time and the boys were ready to have fun. Only that was all they wanted to do, was have fun. They both went in opposite directions the whole time. No matter what we did they would not stay together. If we picked them up, they freaked out- they wanted to be free! We chased them for two hours, jumped up and down to get them to look, yelled, whistled...

On top of that, Baby A, who I like to call Mr Cheese because he is always smiling and showing his teeth off, never smiled. No matter what we did, he did not show off those teeth!

So two exhausting hours later, we have many smiling shots of the Ham, Baby B, serious but cute Baby B and a few shots of the 4 of us where everyone is looking different ways. My back hurts from bending over, my throat is sore from making noises and I know husband is emotioningly exhausted from the turmoil. I guess we won't know if it was worth it until we get the proofs.

12 months- where did it go?

Wow- a year has gone by.

Everyone tells you it will go by quickly, and I knew that it was probably true, but it was hard to imagine what it would feel like. Especially because in the beginning time went by so slowly I could count the sands as they fell through the hour glass.

With the anxiousness of being a new parent and the sleep deprivation that comes with any newborn (x 2) I didn't think that time was moving- except of course during those few minutes when I laid down to get sleep, that went by fast. Someone told me that with a newborn it would be the longest days of your life but the quickest weeks, and that is really true. As the hours seemed to drag by the weeks and months added up quick.

Soon enough the boys were 3 months old and not so fragile, then 6 months old and half way to a year. 9 months was just a blip and now they are 12 months old.

They are little people living in my house. They have complete and separate personalities that are larger than life. They grow and learn everyday. I do have to stop and wonder about myself. Have I grown and learned something everyday? I am very happy with the job of the boys I am raising but I need to make sure another year does not slip by without more focus on myself.

The invisible husband

The other day I accidently bumped into my husband in the kitchen. He made a joke about being invisible. While he was kidding it has really stuck with me.

Our roles as husband and wife have really changed, for the better and sometimes for the worse. I will admit being a wife has been lowered on my list of priorities. Has my husband become invisible? I am always worried about the boys, the house and work, where does he fit in? I know it is normal for some change with kids, but I realize I need to make more of an effort to be present with my husband as a wife. We are in this together for the long haul and I want to make sure I do my best to protect our foundations of marriage.

Invisible? Maybe sometimes, but hopefully not all the time.

Am I the last person to not own skinny jeans?

What is with all the fads and how quickly they are adopted and adapted.

I love leggings. They are great with long (very long) sweaters or short dresses, but something that goes past your thighs. They are so comfy and easy. Over the past couple of years I have seen an evolution of leggins getting thicker and the tops you wear with them getting shorter. I am sorry, but no matter how thick they are, they are still leggings. I am seeing now girls in leggins with their tissue thin t-shirts tucked in! Excuse me, you should not be running around with your behind in somethinga as form fitting as a bathing suit! On the skinniest girl it is still not right.

Leggings were just not enough for everyone, now they are making jeans with a legging cut. I thought the benefit of jeans was that they suck things in where needed and hide some of your flaws. I don't want jeans that hug every curve, just the ones I want them to. I think these jeans are the new legging, everyone is wearing them. They tuck them in to their uggs, riding boots, stilletto boots, you name it. It is the new uniform. Maybe I am just jealous, but I refuse! -Until I can fit in them)

Are men really the bad communicators?

For centuries men have bore the responsiblity of being the bad communicators, but I wonder if the really deserve all the blame.

There are so many books, articles, blogs etc... about how bad men are at expressing themselves and women are hailed as the great communicators. We are the voice of reason, opinion and sanity. However I have really come to question this.

There is one circumstance all women face on a regular basis that tries their communication skills. We all work so hard to explain what we want, use many adjectives and even try and use visuals to reinforce our message. But so many times the outcome is not at all what we expected, wanted or desired.

Why is it everytime we get our haircut, the stylist somehow does not get it all right? I swear we were clear on what I wanted the length of my hair I wanted. We discussed it, where it would fall, how many inches it was and I even showed photos of what I wanted the length to be. In fact, she thought I wanted it to short and recommended cutting it in stages. Well here I am, with hair much shorter than I wanted! How much more explicit can I get, apparently I need to question my own communication skills.